Have a heart

Today we went into our 18 week ultrasound. I am happy to report that almost everything seems to look good. Little baby was definitely not cooperating and wiggling around quite a bit (see donkey kong post). We had to change positions 3 or 4 times to try to get all the pictures. There were a lot of different measurements and pictures, especially of the heart.

The omphalocele is high – close to the heart. As such, the omphalocele has mostly liver. There is a little loop in there that they think is bowel, but aren’t sure. I’m not sure what that really means, and not sure if a bowel loop is a bad thing. Not much explaining in this appointment. Because the omphalocele is high there may be some sort of obstruction on the heart. The heart has shifted a little bit.

The heart appears to be structurally ok, but they do not know for sure until the heart echo. One thing they are concerned about is the heart may appear to be lopsided but they can’t be certain without a more detailed exam.

They have asked to push our heart echo appointment up by two weeks. Initially they asked if they could see us October 29th, but we will be joyously frolicking in the happiest place on earth. So the 5th of November it is. The doctor seemed to really want to see us on the 29th. Not sure how seeing us an extra week earlier would have made such a big difference but she finally agreed with November 5th. Hubby can’t be at this appointment so it will probably be a pretty scary one for me.

The doctor also mentioned they will be referring us to the surgical team and also NICU team. Before she mentioned any of these referrals she casually asked if we are sure we are not terminating this pregnancy. I am not sure if this is normal protocol. I really did prefer the conversation about this issue with the geneticist. Not that it makes a difference, we knew what our answer would be, but it felt a lot like being pressured to make a snap decision with not enough information. Something so serious as whether or not to terminate a pregnancy should not be an off the cuff question during an ultrasound in the procedure room. It should be something discussed in a quiet room, with lots and lots of information. And then there should be time to think about it. And then when the time is right for the parents (within a given time window of course), they should be the ones to let the doctors know.

I am still a bit worried about whether or not there are other things wrong with baby. I just feel like there wasn’t enough care given by the doctor. And maybe she did look at the pictures thoroughly but she didn’t divulge this to us except for a quick “yup looks fine”. It felt flippant and unhelpful. But there is nothing much we can do about it now except wait and see and take it for face value that everything looks fine. And hope for the best.


5 thoughts on “Have a heart”

  1. Phew. In your last two posts there is a lot to be thankful for. Very thankful for even. Comments on blogsites do not have sound which is a shame cos I did do a “woohoo yay” out loud.

    Today’s news also seems good except that you did get a lot of nothing much and there’s the waiting around game to play til the 5th. I’d ask more questions, even say that you can’t help noticing the responses are a bit flippant…. Is that a good thing cos you can’t tell. Blimmen doctors, sometimes they need a little wake up shake up to remind them they are dealing with anxious people! And if Mark can’t be with you, take someone else. Don’t go it alone.

    Anyway, as always, thanks for the posts. Thinking of you and saying prayers for you all. Love and hugs from us fellas xx


    1. Thanks for the good advice, Ella. My friend offered to come with me to my appointment if she can which will help. And yes I do need to be more forceful and direct with the doctors. They just seem always in a rush hey?


  2. What Ella said..,
    Some doctors come with talent and great bedside manner, others with just talent. Then there’s some with just bedside manner. As you navigate this maze look out for a doc that might become your go-to person, one who consistently gives sound information and takes a more personal interest in the Ng/Player family. They might be rare, but they’re out there and having even one of that kind of doc in your corner will be helpful!
    I am sorry such an inappropriate comment was made in the middle of a procedure. Impressed with how you’ve risen above it though!
    Praying for courage peace wisdom and good nights’ sleep in the coming weeks.


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