Today I had one of the routine check ups with the maternal doctor. I was anxious to see her because I was hoping she could answer some more questions about my 18 week ultrasound. When we started chatting my hopes started to drop off a bit.
She didn’t receive the CVS results. So I had to fill her in. Then we went through the ultrasound results and she seemed really concerned about what was reported about the heart. She kept talking about major heart defects, which I didn’t really suspect because the radiologist downplayed it. Although she was still saying she hoped nothing was wrong, I think she was trying to brace me for bad news in the upcoming weeks.
She also has decided that it was better I be followed by a high risk maternal doctor. Le sigh. I thought this was going to happen. I think that this doctor will play quarterback for the rest of this pregnancy, but am not sure. I am pretty confused about who is looking into the big picture.
So here are the doctors I am being followed by or will be seeing soon, and whether or not at one point they told me they would be leading the charge for my care:
– geneticist (said he was lead, and will make appointments)
– radiologist (said she was the lead, and will make appointments)
– maternal doctor (said she was lead, didn’t get all my reports, now handing me off)
– surgical team (third week October)
– cardiologist (first week of November but I need to confirm)
– neonatologist (no appointment confirmed yet)
– counsellor (no appointment confirmed yet)
– high risk maternal doctor (no appointment confirmed yet)
– antenatal unit (I think this is high risk maternal doctor but I’m not sure – they left a message today)
That’s nine different doctors. All who either think they run the show or told me they run the show. This is enough to make anyone’s head spin.
At the end of the day, I need to get used to being my own project manager and just make sure everything gets done. Luckily, I have lots of experience with this at work. There are differences of course. At work, I have been working to try not micromanage and to let all people working with us to feel accountable for the good job they are doing. In theory if people feel ownership for what they are doing and take accountability for it, they will do the best job possible and the best results will be the outcome. In this case, the ultimate accountability lies with me regardless. I can’t pass this to others because my health and baby’s health affects us the most, and the consequences for the doctors is just not the same as the consequences for us. As much as each doctor cares, we care more. Doctors see many patients, but me and baby account for 50% of this family. We have much more at stake here. Doctors, I’m sorry, but be prepared to be micro managed.